Task 2d: Inquiry

What in your daily practice gets you really enthusiastic to find out more about? Who do you admire who also works with what makes you enthusiastic? 

The thing that gets me most enthusiastic is actually doing what I love to do! If I learn a dance routine and I get it by the end of class, well that's cool But i want a routine to keep inside my head, I want to show it off! I want to stand up and give out, I want everyone to see it!! That's why when getting a job is such an amazing feeling because you know you can show off what you've got! Getting my next job is what makes me enthusiastic, knowing that I can do something and there could be an opportunity for me is What gives me the biggest buzz. Even when I get sent a script over for an audition then I am head down in the page getting to grips with the character, becoming that character to ensure that job is mine. it's THE best feeling knowing that all the hard work and struggle has finally paid off. It's also really overwhelming sometimes thinking about how many people they must have seen before choosing you and that also makes you feel a little bit special! One woman that I truly admire and adore was one of my dance teachers at Italia Conti, Pat D. She specialised in contemporary jazz, which was like no other type of dance I had ever seen before. She had created her own acquired style over the years I began to fall in love with it. She only used a few selected dancers in her numbers and luckily she picked me when I first got the chance. We started working closely together, even on weekends and over time she used me as a prodigy to her movements and together we grew as one. That lady taught me so much about dance, myself and the industry I was about to go into and all of it will never be forgotten. An inspiration. 

  Pats work, my solo- The new Wimbledon theatre. 
What gets you angry or makes you sad? Who do you admire who shares your feelings or has found a way to work around the sadness or anger? 

As all performers might agree, the most frustrating thing for all of us Is the rejection. We all go into auditions after having trained at the most amazing performing arts schools, feeling like we're the new 'thing' with soooooooooo much hope in our hearts and quickly that hope is shattered. I was one of these hopefulls and I too learnt very quickly to not be too hopefull about any audition. I have been out of college for over a year now which doesn't sound like very long but the amount I have learnt in that time is epic. For anyone, It is really hard to handle rejection of any kind but it's something I have found most difficult. There are still times now where I think 'yes this is it! Down to the last round, that means I'll get this!!' and then Im out the door quicker that you can say boo! And I can't lie it frustrates me and I do get upset, especially when I ask 'why her? Why not me?'. But that's the thing isn't it, we are all so brilliant! And there are so many of us! And there are so little jobs!!! But
 that's the way this industry is and I feel that's what makes you want it more. It drives the hunger in your belly and if you can hold it out then you can last the fight. I admire all performers out there, and all of my closest loveliest friends that go through exactly the same rejection all the time. We are all in this together and if it wasn't for my friends to pick me back up then I'd still be down there, so thanks guys!!!

What do you love about what you do? Who do you admire who also seems to love this or is an example of what you love? 

The thing I love most about being a performer is the fact we can do what we love to do everyday. We're not stuck behind a computer, bored to death! We can feel good, be fit, makeother people feel good, network with various different people, travel to some amazing places, feel the buzz of adrenalin run through your body, we can be creative, add strings to our bows in various different areas and have the freedom to be seen as whoever we want to be. It's the freedom and creativity that I love. Theres a lot more to performing than just being a dancer, actress or singer and  i sometimes feel other areas of the performing world are forgotten. With the massive amount of competition out there to be the next dancer, actress or singer, it's nice to know there are other routes we could take. Directing, producing, stage crew, voice overs, tv extras, playwriting, stunt work and managing a theatre school are some to say the least. My boyfriend is someone who I admire for their drive towards this industry. He trained as a straight actor for four years at a well known drama school and since leaving has done some good, credible work, but is nowhere near where he thought he'd be at his age. So due to the lack of work/ auditions, he decided to add more strings to his bow and is now the producer of Lonesome Schoolboy Productions, the theatre company he set up a few years ago. He puts on new writing nights in theatres in london, using unknown directors, writers and actors giving the, opportunities they wouldn't nescesserily have. This is great because they can invite along agents and casting directors to help further their careers. He also writes and directs and has given me a great opportunity in one of his nights and this is in fact where my agent spotted me. 

Lonesome Schoolboy Productions are always looking for new talent in writing, directing and acting and could offer you some great opportunities so get following on twitter and Facebook for more info on their next new writing nights. 
Twitter: @lonesomeschoolb
Facebook: lonesome schoolboy
Web: www.lonesomeschoolboy.co.uk

What do you feel you don't understand? Who do you admire who does seem to understand it or who has found a way of making not understanding it interesting or beautiful, or has asked the same questions as you? 

Sometimes I feel like I don't understand how decisions are made within the industry. I wrote in a previous question about rejection and handling it and that is frustrating for us, but what is sometimes hard to understand or harder to believe is how they can make a decision between who casting directors cast for something and who they don't. It could be down to anything - hair colour, too short, too tall, blue eyes, too big, too skinny. Quite recently I went for a panto audition. 700 girls were seen that day, all amazing, all pretty much in ratio to me looks wise. I got down to the last 40 girls after round after round of the same routine and freestyle, giving it 150% every time! I was at the audition for almost 5 hours and when all the boys were paired up with the girls who were left and there were no boys left, the rest of us were told to leave and thank you very much for your time. WHAT?!?!! Why didnt they do that in the first place?! It really is hard to believe how they can determine who gets it and who doesn't, but that's the way it is! My mum is the one who understands when I fall down and get frustrated. I'm lucky to have parents to support me the way mine do. She tells me my time will come, which I'm pretty sure it will and helps me to understand that it is a fickle business and I should be aware and stronger. She gives me great hope.